J.D. Quote #1055
Quote from J.D. in My Missed Perception
J.D.: Hello! If you're wondering what a "Thank you for being my doctor" card from Mrs. Wilk looks like, it looks a little something like this.
Dr. Cox: "Happy anniversary, gals"?
J.D.: Oops. This one's actually for my Aunt Judy and her lady friend. Must've grabbed the wrong card.
Dr. Cox: Newbie.
J.D.: Oh, right, your imaginary warning light. Don't be mad, Perry. This day was bound to come. See, I've studied you. I've taken your best qualities and my best, and I've combined them into something even better. Much the way that iced tea and lemonade were joined to become an Arnold Palmer. Incidentally, has anyone ever done less to become famous? I mean, "Yay for me! I mixed two drinks together."
Dr. Cox: Arnold Palmer is a golfer.
J.D.: I'm sure he has lots of hobbies, Perry. The man's a drink mogul.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Missed Perception’ Quotes
Quote from J.D.
Mrs. Wilk: I choose Dr. Dorian.
J.D.: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I don't even believe it! I don't believe it-lieve it-lieve it! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Yes! I'm shaking! Look at this! It's crazy-talk!
Mrs. Wilk: He played hearts with me all night.
Dr. Cox: [groans]
Mrs. Wilk: You're a very strange man, aren't you?
J.D.: I was a preemie.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: Miss Brooks, your blood work looks fine. But I'd like to take one more sample, just for me.
[J.D. bites into the patients neck with his fangs and spits the blood out into a tube]
J.D.: You taste a little anemic. Get that down to the lab, buddy.
Keith: Right away, Dr. Acula.
J.D.: It's what they call me. How you doing?
[reality:]
J.D.: The end.
Turk: So Dr. Acula is a doctor and a vampire?
J.D.: He's both. And at the very end, I'm gonna put "Dr. Acula" across the screen, take that period, get it out of there, squish it together, it'll say "Dracula."
Turk: That is an awesome ending!
J.D.: Um, thank you for telling me what I already know, Turk.
Quote from J.D.
Dr. Kelso: I heard Mrs. Wilk gave you the axe.
J.D.: She said, "I've led a great life," and every doctor in the world knows that's code for "I'm ready to die."
Dr. Kelso: How old do you think I am, Dorian?
J.D.: [v.o.] Okay, there's no way to answer and not get in trouble. Change the subject.
J.D.: Sir, I would be honored if you and Enid would join me on Sunday for some homemade jambalaya.
Dr. Kelso: Well, it would be good for Enid to get out of the house.
J.D.: [v.o.] My God! He's thinking about it. Change the subject back!
J.D.: You're 78, sir.
Dr. Kelso: You think I'm that old?
J.D.: Jambalaya.