Dr. Cox Quote #508
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Hypocritical Oath
Dr. Cox: Listen up. I have been cursed to work the night shift with you chuckleheads, which means I have to tape the Laker-Heat game, and seeing as no one in the history of this germbox has ever made made it through a shift without saying, "Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Did you see what happened last night on America's Fattest Fatties? A 900-pound woman lost a pound and a half and cried for 20 minutes." Be warned. If you utter a word about the score of the game, it will be your last. Now get out! Go, go, go, go! Chop, chop!
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Hypocritical Oath’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Cox
J.D.: [v.o.] Even though it can be tough around here, sometimes God gives you little gifts to get you through the day.
[Dr. Cox trips on the Janitor's cart while carrying a drink]
Dr. Cox: You're gonna wanna grab a mop.
Janitor: Shush. I'm watching The Sixth Sense.
Dr. Cox: There's a mess in the hallway.
Janitor: This kid sees dead people.
Dr. Cox: That film is at least five years old.
Janitor: So what? I haven't seen it.
Dr. Cox: Bruce Willis is a ghost. He's been dead the entire time. [gasps] Oh! All the best.
Janitor: No! No!
Quote from J.D.
Carla: I'm just saying men let you down. J.D., you have to tell her.
Turk: Baby, when J.D. became a doctor, he took the Hippocratic oath. I'm sorry, but there's no way around it.
[fantasy: J.D. is playing "Hangman" with Kylie. The board reads "YOUR _SSWIPE BOYFRIEND H_S GONORRHE_":]
Kylie: Is there an "A"?
J.D.: Yes, there is.
Kylie: Yes!
[reality:]
J.D.: There may be a way around it.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: I'm going for it. But, you know, I gotta go in there hot. Turk, what's that joke that Mickhead always tells?
Turk: Dude, a guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth." The dentist then says, "If you think you're a moth, why'd you come to the dentist's office?" The guy then says, "Well, the light was on."
J.D.: [laughs] That moth was crazy.
[later, to Kylie and James:]
J.D.: Hey, I heard a great joke. A guys walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth." And the dentist says, "If you think you're a moth, why are you in a dentist's office?"
J.D.: [v.o.] Oh, no. I forgot the punch line. You can't bail out now. Stall, stall!
J.D.: So the moth says, "That's a good question. What kind of dentist are you?" And the dentist says, "Well, I'm a general dentist, but I do dabble in orthodontry, braces and such," and the moth says, "Orthodontry? I hear there's great money in that."
J.D.: [v.o.] The light was on!
J.D.: "But to answer your original question, which was if I think I'm a moth, why am I in a dentist's office, the answer is because the light was on." [Kylie laughs] The light. It was the light, James. Moths love light.