Dr. Cox Quote #3

Quote from Dr. Cox in My First Day

Dr. Cox: Did you actually just page me to find out how much Tylenol to give to Mrs. Lenzer?
J.D.: I was worried it could exacerbate the patient's...
Dr. Cox: It's regular-strength Tylenol. Here's what you do. Get her to open her mouth, take a handful and throw it at her. Whatever sticks, that's the correct dosage.
J.D.: But I...
Dr. Cox: And under no circumstances are you to compromise our no-talking agreement.

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 ‘My First Day’ Quotes

Quote from Janitor

Janitor: The door is broke. Probably the fifth time or so it don't open.
J.D.: Maybe a penny's stuck in there.
Janitor: Why a penny?
J.D.: I don't know.
Janitor: Did you stick a penny in there?
J.D.: No, I was making small talk.
Janitor: If I find a penny in there, I'm taking you down.

Quote from Dr. Kelso

J.D.: [v.o.] Just tell him you can't see Mr. Burski again, he'll understand.
J.D.: Sir, do you think I could skip just this one?
Dr. Kelso: Why, sure, sport.
J.D.: [v.o.] See? Every story needs a good guy.
Dr. Kelso: In fact, why don't you just head on home? You look kinda tired.
J.D.: I am pretty tired.
Dr. Kelso: Dr. Dorian, do you not realize that you're nothing but a large pair of scrubs to me? For God's sake, the only reason I carry this chart around is so I can pretend to remember your damn names. Now, look, if the patient has insurance, you treat them. If they don't, you show them the door. And if somebody dies, you get the autopsy. You get it by rounds tomorrow or I'll be scratching your name off my chart. Are we clear? Answer me!
J.D.: Crystal clear.
Dr. Kelso: Great, sport.

 Dr. Perry Cox Quotes

Quote from My Student

J.D.: [v.o.] It's hard trying to figure out how to reach somebody. I guess the thing I can do is to think of someone I look up to, and remember how they got through to me.
Dr. Cox: Newbie, the only way you could be less productive right now is if you were in fact the wall on which you're leaning. Of course, then you'd be providing some jackass with a wall on which to lean against and reflect on what a jackass he truly is. I know. Here it's a conundrum.

Quote from My Life in Four Cameras

J.D.: What the hell are we supposed to do?
Dr. Cox: Loretta, relax. I've been involved in every ridiculous TV-induced panic there is. Poison pills, SARS, West Nile, North Face, South Fork, East River, monkey pox, Pop Rocks, toilet snakes, mad cow, bird flu, swine flu, and, quite frankly, every other flu that you could really only catch if you actually fornicate with the animal it's named for. And as a parting gift, I will tell you this. Narrow it down to two symptoms: vomiting and diarrhea, because it's just not E. coli unless it's firing out both exits.
J.D.: Sure hope I don't have dog flu.