Dan Quote #28
Quote from Dan in My New Suit
J.D.: So, Dan, to what do we owe this... something.
Dan: Uh, I had to blow out of town. Mom doinked her new boyfriend and then guilted him into getting me an interview. [shudders]
J.D.: Well, you know, Mom does what she has to do.
Dan: Why do I need another full-time job? I got a sweet setup at home. I got a sweet pad in Mom's attic, I'm driving Dad's old Plymouth Horizon, rest his soul, and because I'm the senior bartender at KJ's, I get to take home half the extra chicken wings. A thank you.
Dr. Cox: Dan, do you ever have to pinch yourself to make sure it's all not some crazy dream?
Dan: That does not count as a formal hello, Coxsmith.
J.D.: Don't call him Coxsmith.
Dan: I call him Coxsmith.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My New Suit’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Cox: You know, Bobbo, I find you less repugnant as of late. I'm developing a begrudging indifference to you.
Dr. Kelso: Ah, Perry, you're so edgy and cantankerous. You're like House without the limp.
Quote from Janitor
J.D.: [v.o.] Now that Dan knew Elliot wasn't into him, my focus had shifted from keeping him away from her to avoiding him so he doesn't kill me.
J.D.: Hey, Mr. Brooks. Let's get these bandages off you, huh? What are you doing?
Janitor: Mr. Brooks wanted safety tips on operating propane heaters.
J.D.: As long as you're not my brother.
Janitor: I had a brother once. Well, he's still my brother. My parents adopted him when I was about 12. He was about 46. Actually older than my parents. His name was Clete and he talked like this, "How's it going? How's it going?" Good kid. Did what they said. Make the bed, mop the floor, sweep the lawn, whatever needed to be done. Everything was good till he was in his 50s and, wow, did he have a midlife crisis. Him and my dad fought constantly. And I mean really physically beating on each other. But I don't blame him for it. I blame my mom for sleeping with him. That's just out of line.
J.D.: Yeah.
Janitor: Anyway, the reason I'm telling you this is your brother told me if I keep you focused on me, he would let me watch.
J.D.: Watch what?
Dan: Hey, little brother.
J.D.: [screams]
Quote from Doug
Carla: Oh, what a cutie. Where'd this little guy come from?
J.D.: Doug found him in some dead guy's colon.
Carla: Ugh! [squeaks]
J.D.: Hey, little guy. Doug's still pretty upset about the whole thing.
Doug: Why would he live in there?