Dr. Cox Quote #812
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Conventional Wisdom
Elliot: You know, if you are still having problems with that picture, all you gotta do is agree to go to my wedding, and you can use our camera.
Dr. Cox: Blondie, as attached as I have indeed become to my patient, his death due to my inability to see a clear picture of his heart would still be a preferable alternative to actually having to hear you utter your self-written vows, "My dearest Keith, my heart was like a vault but you picked the lock like an apple thief who picks the first Golden Delicious of the fall harvest".
Elliot: Okay, first of all stop reading my wedding binder. It's private. And I cannot believe that you wouldn't wanna come see me start my life with my soulmate.
Dr. Cox: Soulmate? Try last resort. Let's just be honest for two seconds here. You basically lived in this dump for the last six years and there weren't that many guys to choose from once you eliminate the women and the gays, the too old, the too poor, the ones who just barely beat the wrap for murdering their first wife, and of course, Ted.
Ted: No!
Dr. Cox: Well then, what's left?
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Conventional Wisdom’ Quotes
Quote from Janitor
Dr. Kelso: A SPECT camera, eh? My hospital, Sacred Heart, needs one of those.
Salesman: It's funny you should say that. I was just on the phone with your chief of medicine ten minutes ago.
[meanwhile:]
Janitor: Hmm, fax this to someone. [answers phone] Chief o' medicine.
Dr. Kelso: I'm the Chief of Medicine, Bob Kelso. Who the hell is this?
Janitor: Uh, I'm you. I'm talking to you from a future phone. By the way, sell all your gasoline stocks, everything now runs on potatoes!
Dr. Kelso: I don't know who the hell this is, but when I find out I am going to put my loafer so far up your ass you're gonna have tassles hanging out of your nose. Now, tell me who you are.
Janitor: What's your name again?
Ted: Teddy Buckland.
Dr. Kelso: Ted?!
Quote from J.D.
Turk: [sings] On our way to Phoenix, yeah!
[As the car drives away, the camera is static:]
J.D.: Hey, you know how in the movies when a car gets farther and farther away, you can still hear people talking like they're right in front of the camera?
Turk: Yeah, that drives me crazy.
J.D.: Hey, I brought snacks for the trip. Pringle? Oh, um, turn left here to go on the freeway.
Turk: No, not yet. I gotta stop and go pee.
J.D.: Already? I told you to go before we left.
Quote from Janitor
Janitor: Uh, hey, everyone! I've been looking for a new role playing game, ever since my Lord of the Rings club booted me for using an actual war hammer. So, would anybody mind, if I pretended to be the Chief of Medicine while Kelso is out of town? [murmurs of agreement]
Dr. Cox: Oh, Janitor you're a natural!
[The Janitor is suddenly wearing a lab coat and stethoscope]
Janitor: Fantastic! Let's make cancer feel foolish.