Dr. Kelso Quote #304

Quote from Dr. Kelso in His Story IV

J.D.: [v.o.] Dr. Cox was right. This year, Dr. Kelso had gotten a little lazy. There was the way he handled requests.
[A nurse places a paper in a "requests" letter box, which feeds into a shredder:]
Dr. Kelso: Thanks. I'll look into it.
J.D.: [v.o.] Or how he found a way to eliminate any face time with the patients.
[A patient looks up at the TV in his room:]
Dr. Kelso: [on TV] Welcome to Sacred Heart, Mr....
Ted: Hartly.
Dr. Kelso: I'm Chief of Medicine, Dr. Bob Kelso. I see you're here for a...
[Ted is standing under the TV with a case file]
Ted: Vasectomy.
Dr. Kelso: Enjoy your stay. Ted, you half-wit, don't forget the tape.
Ted: How does he always know?
J.D.: [v.o.] He didn't even bothered to learn the new interns' names.
Dr. Kelso: Listen up, faces. In order to save us all some time, I will call all the males "Daves" and all the females "Debbies".
Debbie: Debbie is actually my name.
Dr. Kelso: Then our reference is to the others, you will be Slugathor. Daves, Debbies, Slugathor I will be in my office. If you need anything, feel free to bother Dorian.

Rate

 ‘His Story IV’ Quotes

Quote from Janitor

J.D.: Come on, no one wants to debate Iraq with me?
Janitor: I'll debate Iraq with you.
J.D.: Prepare to be dazzled.
Janitor: Okay, in my opinion we should be looking for Bin Laden in Pakistan.
J.D.: Do you have that globe nearby?

Quote from Dr. Kelso

J.D.: [v.o.] Since Elliot bought a house, I had to look for a place to live. Time to get out of my head and into an apartment.
J.D.: Hey, Dr. Kelso. [pats Dr. Kelso on the shoulder]
Dr. Kelso: [v.o.] I actually don't mind that goofy bastard, if he were gay he would be perfect for my son. Harrison's been looking for a new power bottom.

Quote from J.D.

Turk: [on the phone] Hey, buddy. You found an apartment yet?
[J.D. is on a park bench reading "The Iraq War for Dummies"]
J.D.: No, man, I feel like an idiot so I've been reading up on this whole Iraq war situation. You know what's so messed up? I just got to the part where President Bush gave his "mission accomplished" speech on a battleship, and I still got, like, 400 more pages to go.