Carla Quote #253
Quote from Carla in My Musical
Carla: Turk, I wanna come back to work. It's who I am.
Turk: Oh. Well, I always thought that family was the most important thing to Puerto Ricans.
[song "For the Last Time, I'm Dominican":]
Carla: I've had it up to here So let me make it very clear. Because I swear I'll never clue you in again. Every time that you profess I come from Puerto Rico.
Turk: Yes?
Carla: For the last time, Turk, I'm Dominican.
Turk: Don't make a big to-do, I was simply testing you.
Carla: Then why'd you tell J.D. our baby is "Blaxican"?
Turk: Babe, you know I know the truth.
Carla: Well, I need a little proof, So list all you know about me or no sex again.
Turk: Oh, let's see. Your name is Carla.
Carla: Oh, yes.
Turk: You are Latina.
Carla: Impressive.
Turk: You are a nurse, your mother is dead and... Wait! I got it. Three sisters.
Carla: Turk!
Turk: Two sisters? Well, I'm sure you have a brother who is a huge jerkoff.
Carla: Tell me what's my middle name.
Turk: Okay, I'm tired of this game. Let's forget it. I give up. I guess you win again. But it's not just me who gets mixed up By all this crazy ethnic stuff.
Todd: Sorry, even I know She's Dominican. Booya!
Carla: Did I grow up in Illinois or was it Michigan? How long before we met was I in Medicine? Was our wedding song The Beatles or Led Zepellin? Am I freakin' Puerto Rican or Dominican?
Turk: The thing is guys remember facts Like what Derek Jeter hit last year Which was 303. And that is why Our brains are maxed. And there's no room for things like Birthdays or ethnicities.
Carla: Well, thank you for that glimpse Into the workings of the inner man.
Turk: Let's talk about your job and Not the fact that you're
Carla: Dominican.
Turk: You're not staying home from work?
Carla: Will that make you happy, Turk?
Turk: I'll support you if you choose to earn the Benjamins.
Carla: Then I'll return to work today. Now, are you sure that that's okay?
Turk: I say "si" which is "yes" in Dominican. And Puerto Rican.
Carla: Turk!
Turk: But you're Dominican.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Musical’ Quotes
Quote from Elliot
J.D.: The mind is a freaky thing, Elliot. Maybe she does hear singing.
Elliot: Yeah, well, I haven't sung since the 6th grade talent show when I did Pat Benatar's "Hell Is For Children". Then afterwards Mr. Shemin, the M.C, said "No, actually hell is for everyone who just had to hear you sing that song." My mom was so mad, she slept with him and ruined his marriage.
Quote from Turk
[song "Everything Comes Down to Poo":]
J.D.: Hey, Mrs. Miller. We just need a stool sample.
Patti: Why do you need a stool sample if you think I'm just a nut?
J.D. & Turk: 'cause the answer's not in your head, my dear, it's in your butt.
J.D.: You see? Everything comes down to poo. From the top of your head to the sole of your shoe. We can figure out what is wrong with you by looking at your poo. Turk?
Turk: Do you have a hemorrhoid? Or is it rectal cancer? When you flush your dookie down You flush away the answer.
J.D.: It doesn't really matter if it's hard of it's loose. We'll figure out what's ailing you. As long as it's a deuce. Yes! Everything comes down to poo.
All: Everything comes down to poo.
J.D.: Cardiovascular, lymphatic, yes the nervous system too. All across the nation, we trust in defecation. Everything comes down to poo.
Turk: If you want to know what's wrong Don't sit and act so cool. Just be a man and eat some bran. And drop the kids off at the pool.
Woman #1: My stomach hurts.
J.D.: Check the poo.
Woman #2: I sprained my ankle.
Turk: Check the poo.
Man: I was shot.
J.D.: Check the poo.
Delivery Guy: A homeless guy just threw poo in my eye.
Turk: Check the poo.
Delivery Guy: Mine or his?
J.D.: First him then you. It may sound gross. You may say "shush".
J.D. & Tur But we need to see what comes out of your tush.
All: Because everything comes down to poo. Whether it is a tumor or a touch of the flu.
Turk & J.D.: Please, won't you pinch us all a big fat clue.
Turk: Our number one test is your number two.
All: If there's no breeze, light a match please. Everything comes down to...
J.D.: Doo doo.
Turk: Doo doo.
J.D.: Doo doo.
Turk: Doo doo.
All: Everything comes down to poo!
Quote from Dr. Kelso
[song "Welcome to Sacred Heart":]
Dr. Kelso: Hello, I'm Dr. Kelso. I'm delighted that you came. So the doctors say you fainted and you don't know what's to blame. Well, put your mind at ease. There's no ill we can't outsmart. On behalf of all who work here...
All: Welcome to Sacred Heart!
J.D.: Our facilities are excellent, you couldn't ask for more.
Janitor: As long as you avoid the bathrooms on the second floor.
Dr. Kelso: This is Dr. Cox, I'll be giving him your chart.
Dr. Cox: And that's Dr. Kelso, the kiss-ass of Sacred Heart.
Turk: You say you burned your hand real bad, we'll fix you up with gauze
Elliot: Perhaps you need your fat sucked out or want a smaller schnoz
J.D.: Hey!
Dr. Kelso: You've caught a STD from some tasty little tart.
All: We swear we won't judge you here at Sacred Here at Sacred Here at Sacred Heart...
Dr. Kelso: One more thing that I should mention if what I heard is true. And everyone appears to be singing to you. Your case is very serious. And we better start. 'cause if you think we're singing, you belong at Sacred Heart.
All: Doctors! Nurses! Patients! Dead Guys! Welcome to Sacred Heart!