Dr. Cox Quote #587
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Rite of Passage
Dr. Cox: I wasn't sure if you wanted to give him more money or skip the middleman and actually give him narcotics. So I went ahead and brought your ATM card and a heroin sandwich. It's not heroin, it's smoked turkey.
Jordan: So you thought if you made me look like a fool, I'd quit, is that it?
Carla: So, Jordan, I heard Sam got you. Don't worry, he totally suckered me once.
Nurse Roberts: When I first started, I lent my car to a patient to go pick up her kids. Last time I ever saw that IROC.
Turk: Remember that Meningitis patient who stole your identity?
J.D.: Darryl, he's cool. From now on, he's only gonna use my credit card for emergencies.
Dr. Cox: It's a rite of passage that you have to go through around here to be accepted.
Jordan: Oh, my God! You actually did something nice for me.
Dr. Cox: No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It was a selfish act. If other people talk to you, you won't have to talk to me.
Jordan: Cute.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Rite of Passage’ Quotes
Quote from Jordan
Jordan: I am your new friend, so suck it!
J.D.: I gotta go talk to my boys.
Carla: And I have to go talk to Elliot.
Turk: Wait, don't leave me!
Jordan: So I hear you and the wife are trying for a boy. Little tip: The night that Perry and I conceived Jack, he was on top, it was about three days before my ovulation... Yeah. Oh, and he was choking me. Oh, it was so good.
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: Oh, would everyone please watch this? Because nobody, but nobody, cries like Sammy. He leads off with the chin quiver. Then he goes right to the look-away. He tries to hold it back but he just can't because there's too much pain! And then finally, he squeezes out one single tear. [fake cries] Ladies and gentlemen, that is some quality Crack Addict Theater!
Turk: I can't watch this.
Nurse Roberts: Then move your big, bald biscuit head! Some of us don't have cable.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: Hey, Turk, I'm gonna go across the street and get some coffee. You want one?
Turk: Get me a small one-pump mocha.
J.D.: [v.o.] The perfect setup to a joke, but no one's around to hear!
[J.D. picks Turk up and carries him down to reception]
Turk: Dude! Oh, God! [screams] No! Dude!
J.D.: So, what did you want me to get you?
Turk: A small one-pump mocha?
J.D.: Wasn't that your nickname in high school? Hello!
Turk: Dude, there's a guy upstairs waiting to have his spleen removed!
J.D.: It was worth it.