J.D. Quote #1781

Quote from J.D. in My Finale: Part 2

J.D.: [v.o.] Endings are never easy. I always build them up so much in my head, they can't possibly live up to my expectations, and I just end up disappointed. I'm not even sure why it matters to me so much how things end here. I guess it's because we all want to believe that what we do is very important, that people hang on to our every word, that they care what we think. The truth is, you should consider yourself lucky if you even occasionally get to make someone, anyone, feel a little better. After that, it's all about the people that you let into your life, and as my mind drifted to faces I've seen here before, I was taken to memories of family...
[fantasy: as J.D. walks through the corridors of the hospital, he imagines various people from his past:]
Dan: Hey, little brother.
J.D.: [v.o.] Of coworkers.
Todd: Goodbye five from the Big Dog.
J.D.: [v.o.] Of lost loves.
Jamie: You never called.
Alex: I miss you.
J.D.: [v.o.] Even of those who've left us.
Jill Tracy: There you are!
Mrs. Wilk: Hi, tiger.
J.D.: [v.o.] And as I rounded that corner, they all came at me in a wave of shared experience.
Nurse Roberts: Keep it holy, Q-tip.
Ted's band: Boing, flip.
Mike: I broke my penis again, but this time it was fun.
Lloyd: Take care, bra. Take real good care.
Dr. Mickhead: I didn't kill her.
Randall: Way to leave a cherry gig, bra.
Leonard: I got me some white meat.
Dr. Zelzter: Key party later. There will be prostitutes.
Mrs. Tanner: Did you ever go on that picnic? Make sure you do.
Lonnie: I hate you so much, J.D.
Dr. Steadman: It's like a baguette.
Hooch: Hooch is crazy.
J.D.: [v.o.] And even though it felt warm and safe, I knew it had to end. It's never good to live in the past too long. As for the future, thanks to Dan, it didn't seem so scary anymore. It could be whatever I want it to be.


Features in the collection: J.D.'s Best Fantasies.

‘J.D.'s Best Fantasies’

Quote from J.D. in My Quarantine

Kylie: So, uh, what's wrong with this guy?
J.D.: Well, let's see. Fatigue, fever, malaise. Have you been to Hong Kong, sir?
Man: Yeah.
J.D.: [v.o.] And then I said something stupid.
J.D.: Could be SARS.
J.D.: [v.o.] I forgot that if any doctor suspects SARS, it's cause for immediate quarantine lockdown.
[fantasy: Indiana Jones theme plays as sirens blare and doors shutter across the I.C.U. Jordan, now wearing a fedora, dives under the shutter as it closes]
Dr. Cox: What have you done, Newbie?
Danni: [holding a flask] Quarantinis, anyone?

Quote from J.D. in My Words of Wisdom

J.D.: [v.o.] As for me, I couldn't help but imagine what my own funeral would be like.
Choir: [singing] My girl wants to party all the time Party all the time
Minister: Yeah! And as you know, J.D. only had two requests. And that is that the choir sing the song that would remind us of how much he loved to party and that he could get one last hug from each of you.
[J.D.'s casket is stood vertically and his arms are spread out]
Elliot: You are the only one I've never faked it with.
Keith: It's true.
Dr. Cox: Hell, I love you, Newbie. I should have done this a long time ago. [hugs J.D.]
J.D.: I knew you loved me. I just had to fake my own death to prove it. He loves me everyone. Can I get an Amen?
All: Amen!
J.D.: Whoo, got him good! [Dr. Cox breaks J.D.'s neck] Worth it.
J.D.: And then we'd have my real funeral.
Dr. Kelso: Are you an idiot?
J.D.: No, sir, I'm a dreamer.

 ‘My Finale: Part 2’ Quotes

Quote from Janitor

J.D.: Look, it's been a very long day.
Janitor: Well, long days are like pancakes... Admit it!
J.D.: Fine! I put a penny in the door! It was eight years ago.
Janitor: What do you know? It finally worked.
J.D.: It was an accident. It fell out of my pocket and rolled into the door. It was my first day. I didn't want you to be mad. Do you believe me?
Janitor: Yeah. I saw it happen.
J.D.: If you saw it happen, then why did you ask me back then if I put a penny in the door?
Janitor: It was a test of character. You failed, and you lost out on a wonderful friendship. [starts to walk away]
J.D.: We could still be friends. [the Janitor stops, looks back and then keeps walking]

Quote from Janitor

Janitor: So your shift is officially over, and that'll do it. Nice knowing you, John Dorian.
J.D.: It was nice knowing you, too... What is your name?
Janitor: Glen Matthews.
J.D.: Well, that was easy.
Janitor: Yeah, it's easy now. When I was a kid, I had a horrible impediment. I'd say "Gen Maffewf."
J.D.: I'm glad I wasn't there during those times.
Janitor: Yeah, I would've torn you to "pieffeff."

 John J.D. Dorian Quotes

Quote from My Missed Perception

Mrs. Wilk: I choose Dr. Dorian.
J.D.: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I don't even believe it! I don't believe it-lieve it-lieve it! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Yes! I'm shaking! Look at this! It's crazy-talk!
Mrs. Wilk: He played hearts with me all night.
Dr. Cox: [groans]
Mrs. Wilk: You're a very strange man, aren't you?
J.D.: I was a preemie.

Quote from My Long Goodbye

Dr. Cox: What the hell am I gonna do?
J.D.: [v.o.] Unfortunately for Dr. Cox, that's when Elliot walked by and showcased her oddest talent.
Elliot: Somebody just had a baby.
Dr. Cox: How do you know?
Elliot: My uterus is glowing.
J.D.: My mom had an uterus. I lived in it.