Janitor Quote #219
Quote from Janitor in My Faith in Humanity
Jake: Buddy, you would not believe the day I'm having.
Janitor: Quiet, jackass. What did you say to Elliot to make her run off like that? 'cause if you hurt her-
Jake: I didn't say anything. Everyone around here is crazy.
Janitor: That's not true. Let me put down my bag of rats and explain something to you.
Jake: A bag of rats? Are those alive?
Janitor: Most of 'em are. I put a dead one in the middle. That way all the live ones get a good look at him they start toeing that line. Know what I'm saying?
Jake: I very much don't.
Janitor: It's pretty simple. Take a canvas bag... Jailbreak!
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Faith in Humanity’ Quotes
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: Keep it light. Open with a joke, and before you know it, you and your raft will be on a 4-hour trip to New Zealand.
Jake: No, it's more like 14 hours.
J.D.: [v.o.] Oh, no, you're dangerously close to revealing that geography is your Achilles heel. Say something smart to regain credibility.
J.D.: Vaso-vagal syncope is mediated by the autonomic nervous system. And Betty needs you, pal. She does. Come on. Do it. You'll feel good. Trust me.
Jake: Trust you? You don't even know where New Zealand is.
J.D.: You can dance your way there from Old Zealand.
Jake: You an idiot?
Quote from Carla
Carla: Anyway, I worry that sometimes when I'm tense, I could be a little condescending.
Therapist: Actually, I've noticed that.
Carla: Have you really noticed it, "Mr. Therapist"?!
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: Just go, Jake. No one here knows your last name. If anything happens, they'll never be able to find you. Go enjoy your little rafting thing in New Zealand. Which, incidentally, is 10,000 miles east of Australia and famous for alcoholism and clam chowder. I've been brushing up on my New Zealand.
Jake: You've been brushing up on New England.
J.D.: Well, go anyway. Wherever it is you're rafting.