Elliot Quote #178
Quote from Elliot in My Dream Job
Jordan: OK, I didn't tell you the kid was yours and you're upset. I get it. But you seem to be making a really big deal out of this. Is there something else that's bothering you?
Dr. Cox: It's mostly just the kid thing.
Jordan: I told you I didn't want you to feel pressured to be with me. I didn't want you to feel manipulated.
Dr. Cox: Jordan, I am so, so sorry, but no matter what you say, you don't have a leg to stand on.
Carla: Yeah, I don't know about that, Perry. Sounds like she's trying to protect your relationship.
Elliot: Yeah, I mean, some mothers say the only way to get a guy to marry you is by using pregnancy as a trap.
Dr. Cox: What?
Elliot: Stupid mothers who got even meaner when they stopped drinking.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Dream Job’ Quotes
Quote from Ted
Elliot: Every time I turn around, Kelso's there. Ted, he's trying to break my spirit. I mean, do you have any idea what that feels like? [Ted points to his face] I'm sorry. Of course you do.
Ted: Dr. Reid, I'm afraid that nothing you've described constitutes harassment.
Dr. Kelso: Swing and a miss, eh, Dr. Reid? Well, the next time you decide to make a stink over nothing, maybe you should see a lawyer who didn't need five tries to pass the bar exam.
Ted: I have stress-induced dyslexia and you know that, Dr. Oslek.
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: Hey, Betty, Wilma. What the hell? You're only 40 minutes late. Do I smell beer?
J.D.: Oh, we had a few.
Dr. Cox: Newsflash: you can't drink and then come to work. You're not airline pilots.
J.D.: Look, Dr. Cox.
Dr. Cox: No, you look. If someone had asked me just this morning, is there any way that I could have any less respect for you two geniuses, I would have said, "No, no, that's not possible". But lo and behold, you pulled it off. Congratulations. The only problem is I'm fresh out of blue ribbons, so instead you're going to have to settle for a lifetime supply of my foot up your ass. Now, go home. You're not fit to work tonight.
Quote from J.D.
Spence: That guy?
J.D.: Yeah. Maybe it would be easier if I just told you whose butt I haven't had my fingers in.
Spence: Now, that's one of the perks you never hear about. You guys landed your dream jobs, huh?
J.D.: [v.o.] Dream job.
[fantasy: John Dorian, Chocolate King, sits in a chocolate office eating chocolate, with his assistant Turk writing on a chocolate typewriter. "The Candy Man" plays. As J.D. tires of the chocolate egg and chocolate hearts, he pulls off Turk's arm and bites off a finger:]
Turk: Hey, man, how am I supposed to finish this memo?
J.D.: I don't know.