J.D.: Really, Elliot, the biggest? Because a few weeks ago, I got back together with a woman who lied to me about being pregnant with my child. You should also note that even though I promised myself I was gonna take it slow, I convinced her to give up her apartment, quit her job, move in with me and start workin' here.
Elliot: Why?
J.D.: I don't know. I'm just realizing right now that I did all that.

Elliot: I just wish there was a test I could take to tell me if I'm doing the right thing. I mean, look at Turk and Carla. They're so meant to be together. You spend one minute with them and you know that. They just have this amazing give and take.
[flashback:]
Carla: Don't you love this tennis bracelet?
Turk: That was awesome.

Janitor: Boys, anything?
Ted: Whatever you do, don't go bald!
Janitor: Lloyd, anything?
Lloyd: Yeah, I'm still not sure who Elliot is.
Doug: Oh, come on, this guy sucks!

Elliot: The thing that freaked me out was watching this woman wipe eye gunk off her brain-dead husband. I mean, I don't think I could spend two years wiping eye gunk off Keith's brain-dead face.
J.D.: Elliot, they were married for, like, 20 years before that guy was in a coma. I'm sure once you and Keith have that much time together you'll feel differently. Still, maybe we're freaking out about nothing, you know? Maybe we are with the right people.
Elliot: Really?
J.D.: I know last night Kim and I had a moment that made me think we were perfect for each other.
[flashback:]
Kim: This salad has beets. Do you like beets?
J.D.: I hate beets.
Kim: Me, too.
J.D.: You do? We're both beet haters. You know, people are so passionate about beets that...
[present:]
Elliot: [clicks fingers] J.D! J.D! A mutual hatred of beets isn't enough to base a relationship on.
J.D.: I know, Elliot, but you interrupted my flashback. After the beets conversation, I confided in Kim that I was really scared about being a doctor and being a dad at the same time, because both of those things require you to throw all of yourself into them. And she was amazing. She really calmed me down and made me feel good about it.
Elliot: Oh.
J.D.: Plus, we both really hate beets.

Keith: That is it. Look, the only person I have to prove my love to is Elliot, and I plan on doing that every day for the rest of my life. We're done here.
Ted: Should we go get him?
Janitor: No, you heard what he just said. He's gonna be a great husband, and you know why? Because we got him there. Way to go, brain trust. Hands in. Not you, Lloyd. You're out.
Lloyd: I figured.
Janitor: One, two, three, brain trust!
All: Brain trust!

J.D.: Why are you wearing scrubs? I haven't seen you in those in, like, two years.
Elliot: I didn't want to get my christening dress wrinkly. These are all I had in my locker.
J.D.: I like you in scrubs. It reminds me of when we used to date.
Elliot: That was a disaster.
J.D.: All of it?
Elliot: No.
J.D.: You ever think maybe we're perfect for each other, we just have the same fatal flaw?
Elliot: You mean that whenever we get too close to a commitment we totally freak out and try to escape?
J.D.: That's what we've been doing here all night, right?
Elliot: Besides, I've thought about it and there is no escaping this one. The gifts are all here, people have bought plane tickets, I'm gettin' married. I've reached the point of no return.
J.D.: You and me both.
Elliot: I mean, to get out of this, I'd have to do something huge.
J.D.: I'd have to go nuclear.
J.D.: [v.o.] So there we were. Together... But not together. And, as always, not knowing what the hell we were doing.
J.D.: Hey.
Elliot: Hey.