Elliot: But this afternoon a patient puked on me. And I smiled. Do you know why I was smiling? Because I really like what I do. I mean, you were right. I got into this for the wrong reasons. But now that I'm here, I can't imagine being anywhere else.
Dr. Kelso: I still don't like your father.
Elliot: Oh, me neither, sir. [takes Kelso's cracker] Oh. They were all out.

J.D.: [v.o.] Maybe the mistake we make is thinking our parents will change. And maybe they did a better job than we give them credit for. Maybe there, amid all the crap they dumped on us, are some things worth keeping. Like a passion for something you never knew you had. Or the ability to constantly surround yourself with people who love you.

J.D.: And "Z" is for the Zs that you'll be getting because you now know heart murmurs from A to Z. Thank you.
J.D.: What are you doing here?
Dr. Cox: Yeah I just figured I'd come, check it out. You know, see how you're doing. And for the record, that was atrocious. I mean, downright abysmal.
J.D.: I know, but did you see A through K? Because I did a really cool thing with A through K.
Dr. Cox: Actually, I showed up at Y, as in "Why, dear God? Why?"

Janitor's Father: You know, this has got to be the most piss-poor, sorry excuse for a hospital that I have ever set foot in.
Janitor: Yeah, well, Dad, in that case, feel free not to stop by every day you're in town.
Janitor's Father: Goodbye, Son. I'll see you tomorrow.