‘My Monster’
Season 2, Episode 10 - Aired December 12, 2002
At Christmas, everyone is struggling with the hospital towering over their personal lives. J.D. goes on a date with Gift Shop Girl, but can't get in the mood. Turk is too tired to romance Carla. Elliot can't find time to search for a new place to live. Meanwhile, Dr. Cox struggles to keep up with work and take care of his heavily pregnant ex-wife.
Quote from Elliot
J.D.: Is this where you're sleeping tonight?
Elliot: Yeah. So? It's cozy. Hospital adjacent.
J.D.: Elliot, come on, this is crazy. You're living out of a van, like a hobo or... Jewel.
Elliot: Her poetry changed my life.
Quote from J.D.
[J.D. watches as Turk and Carla kiss]
J.D.: Hey, how you doing?
Turk: I know we put on a hell of a show, but, dude, put some shades on or somethin'.
J.D.: Let's not make a big deal out of this.
Carla: J.D., when was the last time you got laid?
J.D.: [v.o.] OK, just subtly take the spotlight off yourself.
J.D.: Once on a red-eye flight, Turk groped a transsexual.
Turk: Baby, it was dark, and he/she had a body that was rockin'.
J.D.: [v.o.] Mission accomplished.