‘My Lucky Charm’
Season 4, Episode 14 - Aired January 25, 2005
J.D. and Turk get a life lesson from Billy (guest star Colin Farrell), a man who showed up at the hospital with a bar fight victim. Meanwhile, Elliot and Carla start to feel like they're drifting apart as friends, and Dr. Cox gets a vasectomy without telling Jordan.
Quote from Jordan
Jordan: You know how much I love you?
Dr. Cox: I love you too.
Jordan: Okay, now that we're being all open and honest?
Dr. Cox: Yeah.
Jordan: I do not want to have any more kids. I think you should get the vasectomy!
Dr. Cox: Fantastic.
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: [v.o.] My partner and I - Yeah, I said it - we had heard that Billy was back, and he was mad.
Billy: I warned ya!
J.D.: What the hell happened?
Billy: He woke up and said something snarky, so I popped him again!
Turk: Are you serious?!
Man: Boo!
J.D.: [screams] Oh, you think scaring people's funny, huh?! Well, good! Because you're dying!
Turk: John Dorian, you are a doctor!
J.D.: Well, he started it!
Quote from J.D.
Billy: Sorry about your face, man.
Man: Oh, please, I threw the first punch. It was my fault.
Billy: Right then. I'm off. I'm supposed to be in Florence by midnight.
Turk: How the hell are you gonna do that?
Billy: Her apartment's two blocks away. It should be no problem at all.
J.D.: Well, hey, we're sorry about the whole incarceration thing.
Billy: No worries. Life's too short to hold a grudge. But still, you two boys might want to ask yourselves why you contacted the authorities but didn't have the decency to come and talk to me first. But I should let you two "partners" figure that out. By the way, you're a gorgeous couple. Good luck to you. See ya, lads!
Quote from J.D.
Jerry: When I was alive, I wish I had lived one day like he lives every day of his life.
J.D.: Dead people don't talk, Jerry.
J.D.: [v.o.] We weren't really mad at Jerry, what we realized was that we were jealous of Billy, because he was out living life and Turk and I weren't.
Quote from Jordan
Dr. Cox: All righty, let's go for the hat-trick, there, doc.
Man: Are you sure?
Jordan: Hey, doc! Zip it, grip it, and snip it!
Quote from J.D.
J.D.: [v.o.] For Turk and I, it was important just to get out and start living life, period.
[at a bar:]
Turk: Buddy, it is almost one o'clock in the morning, and we have to be at work at five.
J.D.: I know, but how often do we do this?
Turk: You're absolutely right, come on. Do you have any twos?
J.D.: Uh, no. Go fish, please. Do you have any Ks?
Turk: Ah, please go fish.