Elliot: What is John's problem?
J.D.: Yeah, Carla, what is his problem?
Carla: Oh, he's embarrassed about having breast cancer. Most guys would be.
Turk: You know what else would embarrass most guys? Having their ass handed to them Hong-Kong style in front of the whole cafeteria.
Carla: Elliot, even doctors get self-conscious about their bodies. Remember last month when Turk pretended to visit his brother, but he was actually having his testicle removed? He was so embarrassed, he only let me tell you about it. And he was only comfortable telling J.D.
Turk: Baby, I haven't told J.D.
Carla: How could you not tell your best friend?
Ted: Do you guys even realize I'm here? [writes down] One testicle.