J.D.: The point is, I don't want you fighting my battles for me. I need to be a strong male role model for Sam.
Turk: But, dude, that's my job. Remember? When Sam gets older, I teach him about sports and stuff, and you're in charge of lzzy's emotional crap. We agreed that's how we'd raise our kids.
J.D.: Our kids? Turk, we're not married.
Turk: Dude, we're a little married.
J.D.: I know. I love it.
Turk: Besides, if you start acting like a man's man all of a sudden, you're just teaching Sam to lie about who he really is. You know?