Turk: How you doing, buddy?
J.D.: I don't know it hasn't really hit me yet.
Dan: Oh, it will eventually. But don't worry when it does, Big Bro' will be there. [J.D. laughs] What? What is it?
J.D.: Dan, I love you, but being there for people isn't really yo' thang.
Dan: No, that was Old Dan. Look at me: this is New Dan! I'm totally here for you.
[cut to Dan drinking beers in the bathtub]
J.D.: Dan, you've been in here for, like, nine hours: you okay?
Dan: Well, I'd feel a lot better if you could give that ol' "H" knob there a little twist. Body temp's a bit low. [sighs] Now I can feel my tootsies.