Dr. Cox: What do you say, Bridge Club? How you feeling?
Mrs. Warner: I feel like crap. What the hell's wrong with me?
Dr. Cox: Your abdominal pains suggest you have biliary disease, but your tests came back negative, so we don't exactly know what's wrong with you.
J.D.: But don't worry. Dr. Cox and I never say die. Unless someone actually dies. Then we're kind of forced to by law.
Mrs. Warner: He's talking again.
Dr. Cox: Oh, come on. The kid's OK.
J.D.: [v.o.] "The kid"? This is great.