Moira: In the Balkan Peninsula they say, "silence is but an empty serving platter." I'm sure there's a deluge of benign reasons they're keeping John back there.

Moira: Oh! And the programs arrived today.
Alexis: Can't wait to see them.
David: Aren't these just the cinnamon buns from the lobby?
Moira: And wouldn't you know it, they have presented themselves unfolded.
Alexis: Oh no, so you have to fold them all?
Moira: Theoretically. But then you remember my crippling carpal tunnel from all those years of signing checks. So why don't I grab you a big stack, and you two can turn it into a fun game.

David: I'm out for the afternoon. Patrick is taking me on a picnic.
Moira: Hm. Then Alexis, perhaps you can bring a few hundred to the cafe, and you and Twyla can gossip and fold, and fold and gossip?
Alexis: Nope, this is my one day off, and Ted and I are doing trip stuff.
Moira: They need to be folded! And I brought you pastries, and coffees!
David: Okay well, this coffee has nothing in it.
Moira: Oh, it's just a gesture, David! Stop being so literal.

Ted: We got lots of stuff. Biodegradable shampoo, and malaria pills.
Alexis: Excuse me?!
Ted: Uh no, they're just preventative. We'll also be bringing insect repellent.
Alexis: Okay. Maybe we can just get one of those sexy little mosquito nets for around our bed?
Ted: Those are actually an insane safety hazard. If they catch fire, you're basically trapped in a burning cage, so... But, totally. Actually, you know what? Why don't we go grab some breakfast, and I will tell you more about our bed there, and what we'll be doing in it.
Alexis: Theodore!

Ted: We've just gotta make a quick pit-stop at the doctor's, to get some vaccines, and then we'll grab a bite.
Alexis: Okay, part of me is wondering if we even need the vaccines?
Ted: No, it's just a quick needle, Alexis. Think of it like um, getting Botox.
Alexis: Ew, Ted! What am I, 32? Oof!

David: Hey, what are we doing?
Patrick: We're here.
David: Yeah, I just sorta feel like picnicking by the side of the road is basically an invitation to be murdered.

Moira: Oh, look at you, John, my handsome proletarian. All rumpled and sweaty.

Johnny: Well, I'd be less sweaty if Roland hadn't just stood there and watched me load all the furniture onto his truck.
Roland: Johnny, I am loaning you my truck. And besides, I think you'd look good with a little working-man glow on you. I could do without the musky aroma though, whew!
Johnny: You know, Moira, when you said you needed a few pieces of furniture from the motel to round out the set for Cabaret, I didn't think you'd be robbing us blind.
Stevie: According to Mrs. Rose, our motel is the only place sad enough to pass for a pre-war Berlin brothel.

Alexis: What's going on here? Twy, I didn't know you played solitaire.
Twyla: I don't. These are tarot cards. I'm raising money for a new dishwasher, so I'm offering five dollar card readings.
Ronnie: Yeah, and she's good too. Last time she told me I was in for a bit of luck, and I won ten bucks on a lotto ticket.
Ted: Whoa!
Ronnie: I spent $20, but still.

Ted: Yeah, that's kinda why I don't love this stuff. It can really mess with your head.
Alexis: Babe. It's for charity. Twyla needs someone to wash her dishes.
Twyla: No, no, the restaurant needs a new appliance.
Alexis: Oh, okay. Well, you should probably get your story straight if you're getting people to donate money, though.