Jocelyn: We just brought some leftovers by. We had a little thing at the house last night and we didn't want all the food to go to waste, so...
Roland: Yeah, and you know what? We would have invited the two of you but it was kind of a political schmooze-fest. A lot of pressing of the flesh, and greasing palms, that kind of thing, you know.
Jocelyn: It wasn't as much fun as it sounds.
Moira: Oh well, who wants an invitation to big soiree when you can be met the very next morning with some table scraps.

Ted: Alexis, you wanted to be treated professionally, so I have to ask, where are the rest of your scrubs?
Alexis: Oh. I thought this was kind of an either/or thing.
Ted: No, they come as a set. That's why I gave you both. Those bare legs are dangerous.
Alexis: Ted!
Ted: No, I'm serious. The animals carry bugs or ticks that can burrow into your bare skin.
Alexis: Ew!

Moira: I'm going to presume you were at Jocelyn's thing last night. How was that?
Ronnie: Good. Lots of dairy.
Moira: Oh, yes. If anyone knows how to put a lactose intolerant in the hospital, it's our Jocelyn.

Ronnie: Moira, is there something I can do for you?
Moira: Yes, thank you. Ronnie, I was wondering whether or not you have decided on a candidate to endorse?
Ronnie: Not yet.
Moira: Oh, good.
Ronnie: Why is that good?
Moira: I'm hoping I might persuade you to put your weight behind me. Political weight. I now realize 'clout' was the word I was looking for.

David: Um, I am babysitting tonight, so...
Stevie: You're joking.
David: Mm-mm. I wish I was joking.
Stevie: But you hate kids.
David: Mmm-hmm. That's correct.
Stevie: Oh, my God. Can I watch?
David: No.
Stevie: Or video tape?
David: No, you- No.
Stevie: Can I bring friends?

Doris: [sobbing] Oh, what do I do now? Do I put him in a box? Bury him?
Alexis: Ew! No, we don't have to talk about that right now, okay? I know this is hard. But, um, the upside, um... The upside... Oh! Is that Albert from the down the hall can now come over for dinner without worrying about his allergies threatening his life. Hey, I think it's time that we find you a new love of your life.

Moira: John, wait. I didn't tell you earlier because I didn't want you to back out on me, but you're going to be the only man here this evening.
Johnny: Well, I think I can handle that.
Moira: Ronnie told me that her friends represent a key demographic and I don't believe it's women with husbands.
Johnny: Oh.
Moira: Mm-hmm. I feel really good about this, and I think you just approach these women like you did Paula, our landscaper. Very strong, very forceful.

Alexis: No, I think it was about, um, vacation days.
Ted: Ah.
Alexis: Yeah, you had mentioned two weeks. So I guess I was just wondering, um, how many two-week vacations are available per year?
Ted: Well, tell you what, why don't we start with one and then we'll just go from there.

Johnny: Well, she pulled it off, didn't she? Considering she came in- well, we both did - thinking everyone was...
Ronnie: Black?
Johnny: No. I mean that everyone was leaning...
Ronnie: Younger?
Moira: John, we should go.
Johnny: No, what I mean is that, uh, that I am very comfortable seeing women with other women.
Ronnie: Uh-huh.
Johnny: Yeah, that didn't come out right.
Johnny: I M- Moira and I have been very, very supportive of the LGBTQ community.
Moira: Oh, John. John.
Johnny: Did I leave out a letter?

Moira: Thank you so much, Ronnie. I love your friends and I really loved that dip.
Johnny: Oh, the dip was incredible, really. For men and women.