Alexis: Oh, my God, ever since David left, you two have been so dramatic. Do I have to remind you of the time that I was taken hostage on David Geffen's yacht by Somali pirates for a week, and nobody answered my texts?!
Moira: I had just had my eyelashes dyed, everything was cloudy!

David: So are you nervous? This is like the first job you've ever had.
Alexis: No it isn't.
David: Putting your name on a line of edible nail polish isn't what I would call having a job.
Alexis: I was very hands on, David. I came up with all the flavours by myself.
David: Even the one that poisoned all those people?
Alexis: David, the factory in Guangzhou assured us that it was lead-free. Ugh!

Ronnie: Roland, the rules say that we can't play if we don't have nine players! And I can't stomach the thought of Patrick's team winning by default. The man looks like a thumb!

Moira: But this is actually a good distraction for you. Because when you're on stage, you're going to have to drown it all out. Okay, so let's now focus on the image you were about to conjure for me.
Stevie: Okay, I'm in the Town Hall. I'm wearing my maroon plaid hoodie. And I'm feeling very uncomfortable.
Moira: Hmm, vivid. Visceral. Excellent, Stevie. Although the exercise does ask us to recall a traumatic event in our life. This sounds almost as if you're describing what's happening right now.
Stevie: Well, I am.
Moira: Oop, there's that razor sharp wit that landed you the role.

Twyla: This is so exciting! I've never been in a musical before. Although I did have a cousin who was in Riverdance until she got trampled.
Alexis: Yeah, um, I was one of the original Pussycat Dolls, but I only lasted like, two weeks. Because apparently, I'm "too pretty".