Ted Quote #43

Quote from Ted in The Rollout

Alexis: It's just that we don't want people adopting sad dogs. You know, like, singles are sad enough, so we want the puppies to be happy, and fun, and flirty.
Ted: Yeah, I got that note in your email, uh, but, as you know, these are rescue dogs so it's kinda hard to guarantee fun.

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 ‘The Rollout’ Quotes

Quote from Moira

Judge: Juror 75, you were asked if you had any personal conflicts that might affect your judgments of this case.
Moira: I don't know these people. I don't know these people. The fact that my own world was ripped out from under me, by someone like this prick of a prestidigitator? I should think would help the court in the quest to make a fair judgment. [crowd murmurs] May I approach the bench, please?
Judge: No, you may not. The Court thanks and excuses Prospective Juror 75.

Quote from Moira

Lawyer: Ma'am, can you assure my client and the Court, that you would, to the best of your ability, uphold the law if selected for jury duty?
Moira: Affirmative. Mmm-hmm.
Lawyer: Do you have any life experiences similar to the facts of this case, that might affect your judgment?
Moira: Well, there was that summer that Jimmy Smits stole my heart on stage in a workshop-only production of "An Officer and a Gentleman". I suppose that might be called emotional embezzlement?
Lawyer: So your answer is no.

Quote from Ted

Ted: [talking to dogs] Just be outgoing, be open, and show them your best self. And don't worry, I'll be vetting everyone in advance.
Alexis: Hi.
Ted: Hi. How long have you been standing there?
Alexis: Um, long enough.
Ted: Yeah, I was just giving them a little "pup talk".