Chris Quote #236
Quote from Chris in Farmers Market
Chris: Well, never fear. I will get you Tylenol for your pain and shea butter for your belly. And your voluptuous figure only means your body is working exactly as nature intended it. There, it's all good. Is that better?
Ann: Yeah. Thanks.
Chris: I've been reading up on nipples. The reason that you're feeling nipple sensitivity is because your milk ducts in your nipples are opening up, which is why I bought you this nipple kit. It's from Kernsten's, the nipple people. It has nipple cream, nipple pads, and also a special nipple pimple ointment in case you develop any pimples on your nipples.
Ann: Oh, my God, you have to stop using the word "nipple."
Chris: Okay. Anyway. Hopefully that will help you with any sensitivity that may arise around your... boob hats.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Farmers Market’ Quotes
Quote from Ann
Donna: I'll cede my time to Ann. I have a feeling this is gonna be good.
Ann: Okay, well, I'm not gonna talk for long, 'cause I have to pee again, 'cause I have to pee every six minutes, 'cause I have a beach ball in my stomach that's punching on my bladder.
Donna: [chuckles] That sucks.
Ann: I know. And I'm never not hungry.
Jerry: Oh, well, have some cheese.
Ann: I can't have cheese, Larry! And I can't have wine either. I can't have anything good. You know, what I can have is liquefied flaxseed. But I don't want that. You know what I want? Pork rinds. I want jelly beans. And I want a huge trash bag filled with mashed potatoes. I want to be Pac-Man, and instead of dots, I want 'em to be cinnamon buns. I want to be a giant head and a mouth, and I just want to eat rows and rows of junk food pellets, and where's my trash bag of potatoes? [groans]
Tom: Time.
Donna: Yikes.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: Ben, do something.
Ben: What do you want me to do?
Leslie Knope: Well, you're the city manager. Kick them out. They're violating every single one of the Farmers Market's rules of conduct.
Ben: By "rules of conduct," do you mean that wooden sign you made that says, "Peas be kind to others"?
Leslie Knope: Yes, and "In case of fire, romaine calm," and "You won't bay leaf how nice olive our vendors are." I don't like vegetables, but I'm very good at vegetable puns.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ben: Okay, Harrison Ford movie night.
Leslie Knope: Before we do that, I was thinking more about that chard guy. I mean, it would be very easy for you to revoke their license.
Ben: Okay, Leslie, this is city business, and I'm not an emperor. I can't just kick them out for no reason.
Leslie Knope: The reason is it's vegetable porn. Porn on the cob. I'm sorry. I'm just very good at that.