Tom Quote #514
Quote from Tom in Recall Vote
Tom: Business at Rent-a-Swag could not be better. Yesterday Jaden Smith came in, and he was like, "Look, I want to quit the music/acting business and work here with you." And I was like, "Jaden, be serious. The world needs you. You have a gift."
Trevor Nelsson: Ever since my client opened his store across the street, your sales have plummeted. It's only a matter of time before you're out of business. But my client has had a moment of weakness, something he referred to as "sympathy"? He's made you a final offer... $40,000 for Rent-a-Swag and all of its contents. I suggest you take it.
Tom: Well, I've heard all the facts, and it's pretty obvious what I have to do... Get a big old mug of hot chocolate, put on my thinking PJs, and get back to you.
Trevor Nelsson: The offer is valid for 48 hours. We would also be interested in acquiring your thinking PJs.
Tom: Listen to me very carefully. No matter what happens, you will never acquire my thinking PJs or my YouTube blazer... Nonnegotiable.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Recall Vote’ Quotes
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: Can I ask you a question? Are we the cutest couple you've ever seen?
Herman Lerpiss: Nope. Okay, you want the long needle or the short needle? Doesn't matter. Can't find a short needle. Long needle it is.
Leslie Knope: I have a big idea. I want a portrait of Eleanor Roosevelt, tastefully done, and then she has a very classy tattoo of Pat Benatar on her arm. And that's very subtle. No, scratch that. Scratch all that. Just write "Ben".
Quote from Tom
Tom: I don't want to be a failure again, Ron.
Ron Swanson: There's no shame in failure if you gave it an honest effort.
Tom: Easy for you to say. People are dying to give you money for your business, and you didn't even take it.
Ron Swanson: I didn't sell my chairs to that website because I value my name. The only thing that's important at the end of the day is what's on your gravestone... Your name.
Tom: My gravestone's gonna be a 60-inch touchscreen with a hologram of four mes singing End of the Road by Boyz II Men... But point taken.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ben: Okay, Leslie's on her way in.
Ann: Is she okay? I left her, like, 30 voice mails, and her outgoing message is just her sobbing and burping and crazy laughing.
Ben: Yeah, you know what? She's actually handling it pretty well.
Leslie Knope: What's up, fartwads?
Chris: Are you eating a paunch burger?
Leslie Knope: Well, you know what? If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. I mean, I've been boycotting them ever since Pinewood and her goons started this whole recall business, but who cares now, right? What does it matter? Nothing matters anymore. Mmm. Oh, my God. This is good. This is really good. Why did I ever fight this?
Chris: Have you thought about a concession speech?
Leslie Knope: Oh, concession speech? Yeah, I wrote one. "Eat my shorts, Jabronies. Knope, out."
Ben: I thought it best to revisit the concession speech at a later time.