Tom Quote #425
Quote from Tom in Two Parties
Tom: No! I'm sorry. On principle, I cannot stand idly by and watch a bachelor party peter out like this. Now, I know you said no strippers 'cause they make you sad.
Ben: Correct.
Tom: Then let's go get a drink at Essence. It's the hot new bar in Eagleton. Things Magazine said it's the next big thing.
Chris: But, Tom, this is Ben's night.
Ben: Oh, believe me, if the group's happy, I'm happy.
Jerry: I'd go.
Andy: If you guys spot me. It sounds expensive.
Tom: Just so you know, it's not your typical bar. They specialize in molecular mixology. It's kind of like an experimental new way to consume alcohol.
Ron Swanson: Son, there's no wrong way to consume alcohol.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Two Parties’ Quotes
Quote from Ben
Leslie Knope: What are you losers doing for your bachelor party?
Chris: I told Ben he could do whatever he wants. Sky is the limit. We have Haverford, Swanson, Dwyer, Jerry forced his way in there somehow, things are bound to get crazy.
[cut to:]
Chris: The game is Settlers of Catan. The object is be the first to build a civilization on this fictional island.
Tom: I can't believe this is what you want to do for your bachelor party.
Ben: Look, guys, we don't have to play this game if you don't want to. I mean, I'm nationally ranked, so it isn't even really fair.
Quote from April
April: Is this gonna be one of those cool bachelorette parties where things get out of control and we murder someone, and then we all have to take a blood oath to never reveal our secret?
Ann: No.
April: Then I might have to leave early.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Bartender: Here's your Bud light.
Andy: I ordered a beer.
Bartender: That is a beer. And here's your Nimbus Martini. May I go ahead and chisel your aromasphere?
Tom: Please!
Ron Swanson: This is the wrong way to consume alcohol.