Ron Swanson Quote #302

Quote from Ron Swanson in Live Ammo

Ron Swanson: Chris! Great news! I found a way to reduce government spending by 85%. Here's a hint... no more departments.
Chris: Ha, that crazy and impractical plan may have to wait. Turns out that Bobby Newport, if he beats Leslie, is going to appoint his own city manager. So I may have offered you a job that I have no authority to offer. I'm so so sorry.
Ron Swanson: Well, that is disappointing. But don't worry about me. I'll be fine.
Chris: Oh, I know. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, who cares? We're all just molecules, floating around in random patterns... Devoid of meaning. Well, I'll see you when I see you. I'm a rolling stone. Peace.
Ron Swanson: Stop. Have a seat. We did things your way, now we're gonna do it my way. [gets a bottle of Scotch and two glasses] Prepare to experience true freedom and bliss.

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 ‘Live Ammo’ Quotes

Quote from Ron Swanson

Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] All told, we were in there about six hours. And no, I was not meditating. I just stood there, quietly breathing. There were no thoughts in my head whatsoever. My mind was blank. I don't know what the hell these other crackpots are doing.

Quote from Donna

Donna: [aside to camera] Each animal has a photo, special talents, and a personal history... That I made up. A lot of these dogs have rescued people from burning buildings. This one helped Ray Charles around.
Andy: What? This cat was in Boogie Nights?

Quote from Ron Swanson

Chris: Ron Swanson, it is my pleasure to inform you that you are a finalist for the job of Assistant City Manager.
Ron Swanson: Chris, I feel I should remind you that I do not believe that the position or the entire government should exist. That said, you'd be a fool not to pick me.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: I will walk deeper into the belly of the beast if it means I'm able to further limit reckless government spending. I mean, I have so many ideas. Some are simple like "Take down traffic lights" and "Eliminate the Post Office." The bigger ones will be tougher, like "Bring all of this crumbling to the ground."