April: That's vandalism.
Ron Swanson: I have a problem. This happens to be the studio where a local saxophone legend named Duke Silver records his albums.
April: I've heard of him. I heard he makes mature women swoon when he plays.
Ron Swanson: From what I've heard about Duke, he's kind of a private guy. He doesn't want his nosy coworkers discussing his music with him or knowing that he exists. So, if you happen to see any memorabilia laying around, kindly and discreetly discard it.

April: You got it, Duke.
Ron Swanson: Don't call me that.
April: I dig your groovy tunes, man. Did you hear me? I said, "I dig your groovy tunes, man."

April: Listen up, people. This is very serious. Jerry, if you're eating, you're not listening.
Andy: Thanks, babe. I don't know how many of you have heard, but there's a flesh-eating virus going around. Yeah. It's called "music," and there's only one way to get a vaccine, and that is to play it. To play the-- you get an injection--
Ron Swanson: Just say your piece, son.
Andy: I have finished writing Leslie's campaign anthem. It's called Catch Your Dream, and it's amazing. It's kind of like We Are The World, except I actually think it could have a real impact on society.