Chris Quote #45

Quote from Chris in Soulmates

Leslie Knope: It was all just a joke. I can assure you, there's nothing romantic going on between me and Tom.
Chris: I have a very strict policy. No office relationships, particularly between a supervisor and an employee. The taxpayers pay us, so we can't have anything appearing even remotely scandalous. I'm just saying, if you can't keep your mouth to yourself, I'm gonna have to suspend you.
Leslie Knope: I understand.
Chris: Look. Cucumber flower.
Leslie Knope: Wow. That's so cute.
Chris: Wait, that's a garnish. You're not supposed to eat that.
Leslie Knope: What?

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 ‘Soulmates’ Quotes

Quote from Leslie Knope

Ann: Describe your ideal man.
Leslie Knope: He's dark and mysterious, and he can sing, and he plays the organ.
Ann: I think you just described the Phantom of the Opera.
Leslie Knope: Mm.

Quote from Tom

Leslie Knope: Do you want to go to lunch?
Tom: Uh, no, I don't really feel like going to JJ's.
Leslie Knope: We can go anywhere. Your choice. I'm buying.
Tom: Can I get apps and 'serts?
[aside to camera:]
Tom: 'Serts are what I call desserts. Tray-trays are entrees. I call sandwiches Sammies, Sandoozles, or Adam Sandlers. Air conditioners are cool blasterz, with a "z." I don't know where that came from. I call cakes big old cookies. I call noodles long-ass rice. Fried chicken is fry-fry chicky-chick. Chicken parm is chicky-chicky parm-parm. Chicken cacciatore-- Chicky catch. I call eggs pre-birds or future birds. Root beer is super water. Tortillas are bean blankies. And I call forks... Food rakes.
[back:]
Leslie Knope: Yeah, you can get as many 'serts as you want.
Tom: Well, let's get in my go-go mobile.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: Car.

Quote from Leslie Knope

Leslie Knope: Yellow-haired female likes waffles and news.
Ann: Sexy, well-read blonde loves the sweeter things in life.
Leslie Knope: Much better.
Ann: Hobbies?
Leslie Knope: Organizing my agenda. Wait, that doesn't sound fun. Um, jamming on my planner.
Ann: Favorite place?
Leslie Knope: Upstairs there's this mural of wildflowers, and I like to sit on a bench in front of it.
Ann: Really? It could be anywhere in the world. Paris, Hawaii, the Grand Canyon.
Leslie Knope: No, just the bench in front of the mural.
Ann: What about, like, an actual meadow where wildflowers are?
Leslie Knope: Ew, Ann. I'm scared of bees. Mural.