Ben Quote #25
Quote from Ben in Media Blitz
Man: [on line] Yeah, why should we trust this Ben Wyatt guy?
Ben: Because I'm trusty. Trust me. I'm trustworthy. And I am working very hard to... [sighs] Make sure that this town gets back on its feet.
Leslie Knope: There we go. Okay, great. Next caller.
Woman: So I looked you up on Altavista, and I found out that the last seven towns you've gone to ended up bankrupt.
Ben: Okay, first of all, why does everyone in this town use Altavista? Is it 1997? And second, I am a budget specialist. I went to those towns because they were bankrupt, and now they aren't. And, yeah, I screwed up when I was 18, but who doesn't do dumb stuff when they're 18? Joan?
Joan Callamezzo: I stole my... [clears throat] gym teacher's husband.
Ben: So there you go.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Media Blitz’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
April: Okay, somebody's got to do something. I'm getting a cluster headache.
Jerry: Oh, whoa, whoa, he's leaving.
Tom: Let's go. I'm gonna throw it away. No, I'm not. It weighs a billion tons.
Jerry: What is he typing anyway?
Donna: "If you sons of bitches try to remove this typewriter, I'll kill you."
[Everyone scatters as Ron returns:]
Ron Swanson: I'm gonna type every word I know. Rectangle! America! Megaphone! Monday! Butthole.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I found this typewriter next to the courtyard dumpster. An old Underwood Five with original carriage return. [typewriter dings] Ah. I took her home, polished her up, and bought a brand-new ribbon off of electronicBay.com.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ben: Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings, but these interviews are more important than we thought. Harvest Fest is two weeks away, and awareness is still pretty low.
Leslie Knope: Boy, 35%.
Ben: It's actually 34.2%.
Leslie Knope: [robotic voice] 34.2%. I am Ben, the numbers robot.
Ben: It's just an exact, uh, calculation.
Leslie Knope: [robotic voice] It is just an exact calculation.