Ben Quote #21
Quote from Ben in Media Blitz
Crazy Ira: So this guy, Ben Wyatt, we're looking him up on Altavista. He's from some hick town... Partridge, Minnesota... and when he's 18, he's elected mayor. [patriotic music, fart sound
Ben: That's funny. That's funny.
The Douche: He's 18, becomes the mayor, and then blows the whole budget on an ice-skating rink. City goes bankrupt. [explosion sound] You're out of there.
Crazy Ira: What did you call it again, Ben? What was it called? Say it.
Ben: Ice Town. [laughter] I was just a... I was a kid, and, um, when you... you... you end up getting out there and, uh... and there's a...
The Douche: Oh, I really wish you guys could see this guy right now. He is "draunched" is sweat.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Media Blitz’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
April: Okay, somebody's got to do something. I'm getting a cluster headache.
Jerry: Oh, whoa, whoa, he's leaving.
Tom: Let's go. I'm gonna throw it away. No, I'm not. It weighs a billion tons.
Jerry: What is he typing anyway?
Donna: "If you sons of bitches try to remove this typewriter, I'll kill you."
[Everyone scatters as Ron returns:]
Ron Swanson: I'm gonna type every word I know. Rectangle! America! Megaphone! Monday! Butthole.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I found this typewriter next to the courtyard dumpster. An old Underwood Five with original carriage return. [typewriter dings] Ah. I took her home, polished her up, and bought a brand-new ribbon off of electronicBay.com.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Ben: Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings, but these interviews are more important than we thought. Harvest Fest is two weeks away, and awareness is still pretty low.
Leslie Knope: Boy, 35%.
Ben: It's actually 34.2%.
Leslie Knope: [robotic voice] 34.2%. I am Ben, the numbers robot.
Ben: It's just an exact, uh, calculation.
Leslie Knope: [robotic voice] It is just an exact calculation.