Ron Swanson Quote #124
Quote from Ron Swanson in The Master Plan
Ron Swanson: Just calm down. You don't even know what they're gonna do.
Leslie Knope: Ron, they're state auditors. They're not gonna come and pat us on the back. They're here to slash and burn.
Ron Swanson: Well, I'd be fine with that. This government is diseased. It's like a big, fat, angry slob spending money it doesn't have on crap it doesn't need. Mmm, mmm, mmm. Me want more pointless social programs. Yummy, yummy, yum.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘The Master Plan’ Quotes
Quote from Chris
Chris: Leslie, Leslie. Welcome, welcome, welcome.
Leslie Knope: Wow. You have a lot of bottles there.
Chris: Oh, yeah. Would you like a vitamin? B-12? Evening primrose oil? Willow bark? Magnesium?
Leslie Knope: No, thank you.
Chris: You sure? Really good for hangovers.
Leslie Knope: Okay, I'll take one.
[aside to camera:]
Chris: I take care of my body above all else. Diet, exercise, supplements, and positive thinking. Scientists believe that the first human being who will live 150 years has already been born. I believe I am that human being.
Quote from Ben
Leslie Knope: I'm sorry that I yelled at you. All three times. But I don't think you know anything about my department. Have you ever been part of a government body before?
Ben: I have, yeah. Small town called Partridge, Minnesota.
Leslie Knope: Why does that sound familiar? You're Benji Wyatt?
Ben: I am.
[aside to camera:]
Ben: When I was 18, I ran for mayor of my small town. And won. A little bit of anti-establishment voter rebellion, I guess. Here's the thing, though, about 18 year-olds. They're idiots. So I pretty much ran the place into the ground after two months and got impeached. The worst part was, my parents grounded me.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Once a year, every branch of this government meets in a room and announces, what they intend to waste taxpayer money on. For a libertarian such as myself, it's philosophically horrifying. They also really cheap out on the snacks. Hydrax cookies? Did you know there was an off-brand hydrox? I did not. They're not bad.