Leslie Knope Quote #1552

Quote from Leslie Knope in Gryzzlbox

Leslie Knope: Hello, everyone. We are here today to discuss Gryzzl, and whether or not they are invading our privacy.
Woman: They sent my husband three boxes of genital cream to his office. My husband's splotchy genitals are no one's business, except for his, mine, and his many genital doctors. [applause]
Pearl: They sent me a bunch of toy pigs dressed like movie stars. That's my private hobby. No one knows I collect toy pigs dressed like movie stars, except now all of you people.
Ben: Which one is that?
Pearl: This is actually Ham-uel L. Jackson from the movie, Pork Fiction, it's extremely rare, and I am keeping it. But still, they no right to give me something I will treasure the rest of my life.
Young Woman: I opened my box in front of all of my friends, and it was a bunch of Virginia Woolf novels. Now Miley and Haley know I like to read. What if they tell Evan?
Chance Frenlm: I like their phones, but they've gone too far sending this stuff to our houses. Gryzzl has no right to search our private data.
Leslie Knope: So wait, you guys are not against us on this?
Chance Frenlm: We're not against you on this. [chanting] We're not against you on this.
All: We're not against you on this.

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 ‘Gryzzlbox’ Quotes

Quote from Perd Hapley

Perd Hapley: Now, Leslie, I understand that what you've brought to the show isn't a box of objects, but rather a symbolic box of allegations.
Leslie Knope: Well, Perd--
Perd Hapley: It's Judge Perd.
Leslie Knope: Okay. Uh, I think there are certain questions about certain aspects of certain parts of this situation that require an evaluation about whether or not this is or is not a valid argument.
Perd Hapley: Extremely well-put.

Quote from Perd Hapley

Perd Hapley: To be honest, Judge Perd is stumped by this case. I've also misplaced my judge hammer. I cannot render a verdict here. Therefore, I must declare a mistrial, which is a term I've heard people use in the movies. Tap, tap, tap. Case ended.

Quote from Perd Hapley

Announcer: This is The Perdples Court, a legal debate show about issues facing residents of Southern Indiana. With your host, Judge Perd Hapley.
Perd Hapley: Tonight, on The Perdples Court, we will have the guests that have been booked for tonight's show. The plaintiff, Leslie Knope, who has some big allegations against Gryzzl. The defendant, Gryzzl Vice President Roscoe Santangelo. Who will win? I don't know yet. Which is what makes this a court show.