Ron Swanson Quote #509
Quote from Ron Swanson in The Wall
Foreman: Who's a big guy? [both baby talking]
Judy: Man, forget about working. I just wanna stare at this baby all day.
Ron Swanson: What is the nature of your work on this floor?
Foreman: Total redo: new floors, fixtures, plumbing.
Ron Swanson: How long will it take?
Foreman: Six to eight weeks.
Ron Swanson: Deal. I will do all this work for you in the time allotted. Just have your tools and materials brought up here.
Foreman: Are you crazy? This is enough work for a whole crew.
Ron Swanson: I'm sure the government believed you when you told them that, and I tip my cap to you for profiting off their ignorance. But I'm offering you two months paid vacation and the ability to take credit for my work, which will be flawless.
Foreman: Okay. Guys, let's go!
Ron Swanson: I got all help I'll need right here.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘The Wall’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Leslie Knope: Guys, get in here! Ron has a baby!
Andy: Oh, Ron, cool baby.
Ron Swanson: Thank you, Andrew. Everyone, I'd like to introduce you to my son, John middle name redacted Swanson. John was born some time ago, weighing multiple pounds and several ounces. Much like his father, he is a fan of silence. Please keep your voices down.
Quote from Tom
Ben: Okay, this is the really exciting part. We buy tetrachloroethylene at $1.60 a gallon, but we sell it back at 2.38 a gallon. Now I know what you're thinking. What if it's a cleaner who wants to buy glycol ethers?
Tom: Ben, stop! This is so boring! This is like listening to a TED talk by the color beige.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] In the time I've worked here, I've taken great pains to see as little of this building as possible. Turns out the third floor is silent, empty, and completely free of government work. I can't think of anything more beautiful to share with my son.