Perd Hapley Quote #10
Quote from Perd Hapley in Campaign Shake-Up
Jennifer Barkley: I just think our opposition is losing sight of what all this is about.
Leslie Knope: What this is about is Pawnee, and that is what I care about. What Bobby Newport cares about is romping around on some beach in Spain with a floozy.
Jennifer Barkley: [laughs] Excuse me?
Leslie Knope: Oh, maybe you hadn't heard of it. It wasn't in the New York Times or Le Monde, which is what she reads. It was in the Pawnee papers.
Jennifer Barkley: Bobby Newport's personal life is neither here nor there.
Leslie Knope: It's certainly not here. And I think Pawneeans deserve a city councilor who stays in the city, like I do.
Jennifer Barkley: Well, we were going to keep this secret until we had everything in writing, but Bobby Newport is trying to convince a major European company to open up a factory in Pawnee. And that woman that he is with is an anti-landmine advocate. I didn't realize that you were pro-landmine.
Perd Hapley: I am not here to declare a winner, but Jennifer is the winner.
Jennifer Barkley: Thank you.
Perd Hapley: Now it's time to move onto our next segment, which is a commercial.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Campaign Shake-Up’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Chris: The department is so small because Leslie Knope single-handedly does the work of four people. And she's already scaled back her time. If she wins, she'll be dividing her time between Parks and City Council. I'm going to have to hire a deputy director to pick up the slack.
Ron Swanson: No! Chris, that's unnecessary. The department is doing fine without Leslie.
Chris: Then prove it. Complete one major project.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: Either we complete a government project which is abhorrent to me, or we bring a new person into the department, which repulses me to my core. Reminds me of when my dad made me choose which of my pet calves to slaughter with my own hands for my sixth birthday. I couldn't choose, so I slaughtered both of them. And they were delicious.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Chris: Question for you. In a town of this size, the Parks department traditionally has ten employees. You have only seven. Why is that?
Ron Swanson: I work hard to make sure my department is as small and ineffective as possible.
Quote from Ann
Ron Swanson: Hello, Ann Perkins.
Ann: This is the first time you've said my entire name correctly.
Ron Swanson: Nonsense. We are close friends. I have good news for you. I'm making the water fountain hygiene upgrade our number one priority.
Ann: Oh, great.
[aside to camera:]
Ann: For some reason, when people in Pawnee use the water fountain, they put their mouths completely over the spouts. It's like this weird, disgusting, local quirk. Kiss one water-fountain drinker, you're kissing everyone in Pawnee. Including him.