Ben Quote #327
Quote from Ben in Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington
Ron Swanson: Please don't hold anything Andy did against April. She is an exceptional human being, who married a well-meaning goofball.
Ben: And I think that presentation we put together says it all.
Ron Swanson: All we're asking is that you meet with her and seriously consider her for the job.
Ben: And if she disappoints you, you can hold me... accountable. [Barney laughs] Right?
Barney: You know what? If her friends are trying this hard, there must be something amazing about her. Tell her I'll meet with her tomorrow--
Ben: Uh, hold on. [answers phone] April? Hey, we were just talking about you. We got some good news. Oh, boy. Okay. [hangs up] She doesn't want the job.
Barney: I see.
Ron Swanson: Well, this is uncomfortable.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington’ Quotes
Quote from Andy
Ben: I think that job's perfect for April. We just have to convince Barney to give her a shot. I mean, first problem, she's not as qualified as the other applicants.
Andy: Simple solution. I break into her college and I change her degree to accounting. Easy. On my way out, look up at the blackboard, what is that? Impossible math equation? I solve it. X equals Y, obviously. Professor comes up to me and says, "I've been working on that for 50 years. Why don't you accept this math trophy?" By the time he turns around, I'm gone.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Come on, let me show you around. This is a door. These, of course, are walls. What else? What else? Ah! Meet our Vice President, Don Swanson. Don, this is Andrew and Benjamin.
Don Swanson: Pleasure to meet you.
Ben: Is this your brother? You have a brother.
Ron Swanson: No. Fine. Yes. I suppose the cat's out of the bag. I have a brother. One brother.
Ben: All those years together at the Parks Department and you never told us you had a brother.
Don Swanson: You worked at the Parks Department?
Ron Swanson: Tour's over!
Quote from Andy
Andy: Well don't fret, cookie. We've made progress, haven't we? We got a whole list of all the things you need out of a new job. Apple juice, barbecue sauce, Count Chocula-- Wait. Oh, sorry, that's the list of cool new nicknames I want people to call me.