Leslie Knope Quote #1582

Quote from Leslie Knope in Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington

Leslie Knope: Okay, so five yeses and four nos. Not a bad start.
Randy: So, Leslie, I was going to talk to you about this in a few weeks, but Mike Norbert is retiring.
Leslie Knope: Oh, really? 'Ol Norbs is stepping down. Couldn't handle the pressure, huh? What a wuss.
Randy: His marriage is falling apart.
Leslie Knope: Oh- Oh, okay.
Randy: She had an affair with his best friend.
Leslie Knope: Ooh, okay, I feel bad about what I said before.

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 ‘Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington’ Quotes

Quote from Andy

Ben: I think that job's perfect for April. We just have to convince Barney to give her a shot. I mean, first problem, she's not as qualified as the other applicants.
Andy: Simple solution. I break into her college and I change her degree to accounting. Easy. On my way out, look up at the blackboard, what is that? Impossible math equation? I solve it. X equals Y, obviously. Professor comes up to me and says, "I've been working on that for 50 years. Why don't you accept this math trophy?" By the time he turns around, I'm gone.

Quote from Ron Swanson

Ron Swanson: Come on, let me show you around. This is a door. These, of course, are walls. What else? What else? Ah! Meet our Vice President, Don Swanson. Don, this is Andrew and Benjamin.
Don Swanson: Pleasure to meet you.
Ben: Is this your brother? You have a brother.
Ron Swanson: No. Fine. Yes. I suppose the cat's out of the bag. I have a brother. One brother.
Ben: All those years together at the Parks Department and you never told us you had a brother.
Don Swanson: You worked at the Parks Department?
Ron Swanson: Tour's over!

Quote from Andy

Andy: Well don't fret, cookie. We've made progress, haven't we? We got a whole list of all the things you need out of a new job. Apple juice, barbecue sauce, Count Chocula-- Wait. Oh, sorry, that's the list of cool new nicknames I want people to call me.