April Quote #251
Quote from April in Animal Control
Leslie Knope: April, I have a gift for you. Ta da.
Chris: At Leslie's suggestion, I have made you deputy director of Animal Control within the Parks Department. You'll be amazing at it, and the best part, there is no confirmation hearing.
April: How did you make this plaque so quickly?
Leslie Knope: I had it made your first week here. I knew you'd be going places, so I wanted to be prepared.
April: Can I hire an intern?
Leslie Knope: Not yet.
April: Can I hire a Mexican elf?
Leslie Knope: No.
April: Can I buy a child bride?
Leslie Knope: No.
April: Then how is this even a promotion?
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Animal Control’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: I'd like to object again to being brought here against my will.
Ann: Okay, I'm just gonna double-check your form here. Ron! You redacted all the information.
Ron Swanson: I answered some of them.
Ann: For "date of birth," you wrote "springtime."
Ron Swanson: Which is true.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ann: Hey, you look better. I guess actual medicine can be effective. Who'da thunk?
Ron Swanson: Please leave me alone.
Ann: Not until we go over your test results and your blood work. Your blood pressure looks fine. I'm not sure how this is possible, but your cholesterol is 120, which is the lowest I've ever seen.
Ron Swanson: What's "cholesterol"?
Ann: And the only problem I see is that your potassium's low, so just eat a banana once in awhile.
Ron Swanson: No, thank you. I live the way I live, I eat the things I eat, and I'll die the way I'll die.
Ann: That's oddly beautiful... but also stupid. You're not alone in the world anymore, Ron. You're dating a woman who has two kids, so every three days, think about Ivy and Zoe and Diane, and eat a damn banana.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Before you begin, a few ground rules. I need you to explain everything you do before you do it, so I can determine whether I will allow you-- [Dr. Harris puts a tongue depressor in Ron's mouth] Oh! Ugh! Balsa wood? You could at least use mahogany.