April Quote #197

Quote from April in Ben's Parents

Andy: All right, Chris, here's the plan. I'm just gonna list off happy things until you're cheered up. Pizza, the beach, rock and roll music...
April: And I'll list terrible things to bring you back down. Smallpox, botched surgery, snails crawling out of your mouth.
Chris: This is weirdly working. It's evening me out. Okay, keep going, keep going.
Andy: Laughter.
April: Snails crawling out of your mouth.
Andy: The beach.
April: Snails crawling out out of your mouth.
Andy: Cute cats.
April: Snails crawling out of your butt.
Andy: Dave Matthews Band.
April: Dave Matthews Band.

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 ‘Ben's Parents’ Quotes

Quote from Ron Swanson

Tom: Ron in 60 seconds.
Ron Swanson: Tom. I haven't seen you tonight.
Tom: I've been working on my presentation. I just came by to congratulate Leslie, and then I'm heading back.
Ron Swanson: I admire the work ethic.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: I'm always looking for new investments. Ever since I got my first job at the age of nine, I have put all my money into gold, which is currently at an all-time high. So I have a certain amount of money. I've said too much.

Quote from Leslie Knope

Ben: This is amazing.
Leslie Knope: I know. I worked really hard on it. And, out of respect, I did not include any images of the only other man in the world who's as sexy as you, Joe Biden.
Ben: Yes, you did, right there.
Leslie Knope: Hmm? Oh, well, that's just a little one.

Quote from Ben

Leslie Knope: Okay, we are off to a rocky start, but we are gonna fix this.
Ben: Yes, we will. I called a cab. It's outside. I gave the driver 100 bucks to sit and wait, so whenever we're ready to go - like, maybe right now - all we have to do is walk outside.
Leslie Knope: No, I want to be here now, with you and your parents. Help me make this work.
Ben: Okay, fine. Best thing to do is distract them with innocuous talk about the stuff they care about.
Leslie Knope: Great, like what?
Ben: Well, they're white people from Minnesota, so hockey, fishing, skiing, sailing, and after a few drinks, put on a Prince album. Don't mention the Green Bay Packers or the state of Iowa. And also, I have enough frequent flyer miles to get us to Australia tonight.