Chris Quote #134
Quote from Chris in Ms. Knope Goes to Washington
Chris: [aside to camera] I offered Ron a job last month, and he turned me down. And it literally broke my heart. But now I see that this is truly where he belongs. Way to be, Ron! You're really getting it done, man! He can't hear me.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Ms. Knope Goes to Washington’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ranger Patrick: Hey, Ron. You're not going to slaughter that pig here, are you?
Ron Swanson: Not to worry. I have a permit.
Ranger Patrick: This just says, "I can do what I want."
Ron Swanson: I am the director of the Parks Department, and this is a park.
Ranger Patrick: It's not a Parks thing. It's against, like, three laws and a dozen health codes.
Ron Swanson: Fine. Barbecue is postponed until I can go pick up some meat from the Food 'n' Stuff. Let's go, Tom. No, pig Tom. [Donna laughs]
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Okay, let's begin the barbecue.
Chris: Oh, hey, little guy. What are you doing? Oh, no.
Ron Swanson: Everyone, meet your meat.
All: No!
Tom: Why are you doing this to us?
Ron Swanson: Well, in my opinion, not enough people have looked their dinner in the eyes and considered the circle of life. This is your dinner. His name is Tom.
Donna: [laughs] Burn.
Tom: Seriously?
Ron Swanson: I understand that it's hilarious, but that is his given, Christian name. Tom is very smart and incredibly loyal. He's basically a dog. A dog we're going to cook, chew, and swallow.
Ann: Dude, there's kids around here.
Ron Swanson: Good point. Which one of you youngsters wants to help me drain the blood from this animal? If you do a good job, I'll give you the bladder. You can blow it up for a fun play ball.
Quote from Tom
Donna: Where is Swanson?
Tom: Man, I'm hungry. My legs are tired. It feels like I just exercised.
Jerry: Just sit on the ground.
Tom: No, Jerry. It's dirty, and I'm wearing my summer linens.
Ann: God, you're such a baby. Look, I brought a picnic blanket from your house.
Tom: That's not a picnic blanket. That's a Merino wool throw for my Eames chair!