Tom Quote #282
Quote from Tom in I'm Leslie Knope
Tom: Brand-new day, brand-new merch. I got you guys some awesome Entertainment 7Twenty stuff. Donna, this is for you. Entertainment 7Twenty umbrella. Entertainment 7Twenty fly swatters. Rubik's cube with my face on it. Breath mints. Fireplace bellows. And...drum roll please. [drum roll sound] Drum roll sound effect key chain.
April: Shouldn't you be working at your new company, Tom?
Tom: I am working, April. I'm making high-level network contacts. You think Bethenny Frankel sits behind a desk all day? She makes $100 million a year. How much you make a year?
April: $101 million.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘I'm Leslie Knope’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Hello, Tammy.
Tammy One: Ronald.
Ron Swanson: That's enough small talk. What do you want?
Tammy One: You remember what I do for a living, I trust?
Ron Swanson: Yes. You ruin people's lives.
Tammy One: You're being audited, Ronald.
Ron Swanson: I don't care.
Tammy One: Then why is your mustache trembling? I'm here as a friend. Call it nostalgia. Or perhaps guilt for all the times I tried to smother you in your sleep.
Ron Swanson: I don't need your help.
Tammy One: Wrong. You do. But as you're so fond of saying, it's a free country. Good luck. I hope you don't go to jail. [to April] Sit up straight. You're not doing your breasts any favors.
April: Thank you.
Andy: Hi. Your breasts look amazing.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: You know, when I was 12, my brother shot me in the pinky toe with a nail gun. Granted, it was a hilarious prank, and we all had a good laugh.
Leslie Knope: That's awful.
Ron Swanson: But I avoided going to the doctor. I hate paperwork. After a few weeks, the toe just kinda fell off. Leslie Knope: You only have nine toes?
Ron Swanson: I have the toes I have. Let's just leave it at that. The point is the doctor said if I had come in right away, they might've saved the toe. You can't run away from your problems.
Leslie Knope: Especially if you only have nine toes. Sorry. That was uncalled for.
Ron Swanson: I'm Ron Swanson. And you're Leslie [bleep] Knope. You with me?
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: Okay, so now you're sure that everything is okay, you know, down there?
Dr. Harris: You're perfectly healthy.
[aside to camera:]
Dr. Harris: That man has the largest penis I have ever seen. I actually don't even know if he has mumps. Forgot to look. I was distracted by the largest penis I have ever seen.