Tom Quote #258
Donna: You want us to memorize this whole script?
Tom: I do, ideally. But, if you want to wing it, your talking points are high-end, VIP, lifestyle. All right, let's run through it once. And action!
Jerry: "The weather has been so weird lately. Hey, let me buy you all a drink."
April: "I'll take something basic like a beer."
Andy: "Yeah, I'm pretty... boring. So I'll take a beer, too."
Ron Swanson: "Not me. I want this night to get ca-razzy."
Tom: Ca-raaazy. Like crazy.
Ron Swanson: [flatly] "I want this night to get ca-razy. Get me a shot of Snakejuice. I hear it has a dope aftertaste."
Tom: All right, that's gonna be a cut. Um, Ron, you got to say it like you mean it.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘The Fight’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I won't publicly endorse a product unless I use it exclusively and I really believe in it. My only official recommendations are U.S. Army-issued mustache trimmers, Morton's Salt, and the C.R. Laurence Fein two-inch, axe-style scraper oscillating knife blade.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: [aside to camera] Ann came in the next day and had a second interview with Chris. She nailed it, of course. But she doesn't want to totally leave her job. So they struck up a deal. She works at City Hall part-time, and two days a week, she still gets to be the greatest nurse in the world. Win-win. We need to remember what's important in life... friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, work... it doesn't matter. But work is third.
Quote from Tom
Jean-Ralphio: Listen, you got to jump on the Tommytown Express. This guy has some of the best investment ideas I've ever heard in my life.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: Make a baby tuxedo clothing line. A department store with a guest list. White fur ear muffs for men. A new brand of bottled water called H2-HO. Contact lenses that display text messages. Invent a phone that smells good. Own a night club called eclipse that's only open for one hour two times a year. Cover charge... $5,000. I can keep going.