Tom: They put up a fence.
Leslie Knope: Who? [gasps] No!
Andy: What's that?
Leslie Knope: There's a small park on the line between Pawnee and Eagleton, and...
Tom: Last night Eagleton put up a fence around their side to keep us disgusting Pawnee hobos off their precious land. There's even a security guard. You got to show Eagleton I.D. to get in.
Donna: Eagleton is a bunch of rich snobs. And that's coming from someone who has a Mercedes with a Harman Kardon Logic 7 surround-sound system.

Leslie Knope: Happy Birthday, Ron.
Ron Swanson: Ann said you had a big party... sombreros, karaoke.
Leslie Knope: Yeah, I did that for Ann. Why would I throw Ron Swanson an Ann Perkins party?
Ron Swanson: What about the giant list of things April was doing?
Leslie Knope: That was just a list of ways to mess with you. She do 'em all?
Ron Swanson: She did indeed.
Leslie Knope: So I have rented Bridge on the River Kwai and The Dirty Dozen. [cork pops] Artie from security is outside the door, so no one will bother you. And a cab will be here whenever you're ready to take you home.
Ron Swanson: Thank you.

Ron Swanson: I command you to do nothing.
Leslie Knope: I'm not gonna do nothing. I'm gonna do something. And it's gonna be really big. I have a lot of years to make up for.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: I don't like loud noises and people making a fuss, and I especially don't like people celebrating because they know a piece of private information about me. Plus, the whole thing is a scam. Birthdays were invented by Hallmark to sell cards.