Tom Quote #23

Quote from Tom in The Banquet

Leslie Knope: I need to mention the park and in a very subtle way, I need to let people know that I'm forging my own path and I have my own subcommittee. But I don't want to sound braggy. What do I do?
Tom: It's about appearing humble, you know? Abraham Lincoln, when he started his speeches, he would come up and say, "My name's Abraham Lincoln. I'm the President of the United States. But I'm gonna be honest with you. I have no clue what I'm doing." So, maybe you start off with something like that.

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 ‘The Banquet’ Quotes

Quote from Ron Swanson

Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I enjoy government functions like I enjoy getting kicked in the nuggets with a steel-toe boot. But this hotel always serves bacon-wrapped shrimp. That's my number one favorite food wrapped around my number three favorite food. I'd go to a banquet in honor of those Somali pirates if they served bacon-wrapped shrimp. Excuse me.

Quote from Ron Swanson

[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: I refuse to lather Marlene up, kiss her ring like everybody else. Instead I'll be delivering a speech of facts.
[later:]
Ron Swanson: Marlene is a woman. She has worked in the government for three decades. Thirty years. Properly applied, that's how long a good varnish should last. So, Marlene, it is true that you have won this award.

Quote from Leslie Knope

Leslie Knope: This is very exciting. This is a big night. We are gonna meet some powerful people tonight, so take this down.
Tom: Mmm-hmm.
Leslie Knope: Good evening. Marlene Griggs-Knope is my mother.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: How important are speeches? I don't know, ask the Gettysburg Address. Oh, it didn't answer your call? Maybe because it was in the Smithsonian.