Quote from Ron Swanson in Gin It Up!
Trevor Nelsson: I don't even need an exact number. Just ballpark it. That's all I need to get started.
Ben: Or, I'm sure the state government would love to use your money to hire more bureaucrats, maybe build a library.
Ron Swanson: Fine, a ballpark figure.
Trevor Nelsson: Thank you. God.
[Ron writes on a Post-it note and hands it to Trevor]
Trevor Nelsson: Holy [bleep]. Is this a joke?
Ron Swanson: Another word for "jokes" is "lies." I do not lie. Therefore, I do not joke.
Trevor Nelsson: Mr. Swanson, an estate of this size means that your children would never have to work a day in their lives. This is going to take some time. Trusts need to be drawn, tax shelters.
Ron Swanson: That's enough. I do not need some drawn-out legal expedition to tell me what I knew when I was eight. Here's my original will. Do whatever lawyer nonsense you have to to make it official, and I will sign it. Good day.
Trevor Nelsson: Wait. What are all these symbols?
Ron Swanson: [laughs] I was right not to be threatened by you.