Paul: And what exactly did you witness?
Andy: Defendant, alias Ron Swanson, alias my boss, used appropriate force to prevent further damage to the wedding of Leslie Knope, alias my other boss.
Paul: You sound as if you have a special interest in law enforcement.
Andy: Yes, sir. In fact, at the time, I was trying to become a police officer but was deemed unfit for the force.
Paul: And what happened?
Andy: Don't know. Well, I pooched the brain exam. Just to be safe, I wouldn't take anything I say too seriously. Next witness, your honor.