Garth Blundin: The Pawnee charter is not a "living document," Ms. Knope. You have no respect for the traditions of this town.
Leslie Knope: I absolutely do. I used to give tours at the Pawnee Historical House. Three times, "Employee Of The Fortnight."
Garth Blundin: Oh, big deal, you put on a costume for a couple hours. By that logic, every time I go to bed at night, I am Wolverine.
Leslie Knope: You bought X-Men pajamas?
Garth Blundin: I won them, madam, in a raffle.
Leslie Knope: The point is is that our Founding Fathers were brilliant and they were courageous, but they also had wooden teeth and pooped in holes in the ground. It was a more primitive time.
Garth Blundin: It was a better time. You wouldn't have survived two weeks in their day.
Leslie Knope: Oh, really? How about a little wager? How about you and I go live in that historical house, no modern technology, 1817 rules. If you last longer, I withdraw my bill. I win, you stop this nonsense.
Garth Blundin: [laughs] You have yourself a deal.