Ann: Morning. Is Leslie here? Aw, man. I am so tired. I took a half-shift at the hospital last night. And I had this really weird patient.
April: Weird how?
Ann: I probably shouldn't talk about it. It's one of the grossest things I've ever seen.
Ron Swanson: Talk.
Ann: Well, this guy came in. He got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and he tried to cut himself out.
April: Was there a lot of blood?
Ron Swanson: What kind of blade did he use?
Ann: Uh, three-and-a-half-inch? Serrated? Buckets of blood. He passed out over his arm, and slumped onto the floor.
April: Did the bone show?
Ron Swanson: Very good question, April. Answer her.
Ann: Yeah. The bone showed.
[aside to camera:]
Ann: Everyone in the universe loves a gross medical story. Boom! I win!