Ron Swanson: We are not saying I was the problem. If we're gonna lie to them, I will not let you lie to them.
Leslie Knope: Fine! I'll tell them that for the past three years, you've been a perfect gentleman and scholar, and I am an insane weirdo who, despite being the only reason we even had a friendship to begin with, decided to ruin it out of the blue for no good reason.
Ron Swanson: That sounds good. Let's go with that.
Ron Swanson: What are you doing?
Leslie Knope: I destroyed the monitor!
Ron Swanson: What if we have an emergency and have to get out of here?
Leslie Knope: I did not consider that possibility!