Leslie Knope: Okay, time for gifts. We have gift certificates for facials for everybody, then you're gonna get a needlepoint pillow with your face on it and the lead headline from a newspaper on the day you were born.
Marlene Knope: "Joseph Stalin dies"?
Leslie Knope: That's right, Mom, and you replaced him. Though not in terms of genocide. Just in terms of, you know, being on earth.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: February 14th, Valentine's Day, is about romance, but February 13th, Galentine's day, is about celebrating lady friends. It's wonderful, and it should be a national holiday. It should be a national holiday. [writes on phone] Dear Congress, it's Leslie again.